I Dont Wanna Grow Up!!!!

This past weekend I went to Coe's Admitted Student Weekend thing...

So at it we were able to get a tour, stay the night (although I didn't), go to different sessions that help you learn more about Coe, and get financial aid advice. It was helpful, yeah, and the people were really nice, but all I could think about the whole time is I don't know what to expect out of any of this. It's a scary thought...the whole growing up thing. I'm going to be living on my own...which isn't a big problem for me. But I'm going to have to balance out my schedule to afford all of my bills, go to work, actually study and read my textbooks (which I never had to do to get by in high school, get all of my homework done, maintain a 3.0, still have a social life, and be able to spend as much time I want with my boyfriend.

It all just seems to be hitting me so fast. Like I have to make all of these decisions all at the same time and I know I have to, but it's so rushed and crazy that I don't know what to think half of the time. Or am I really making the right decision?? Coe has an average class size of 12-16 people in the class. That would be half of the class size I'm use to. True...this will get me more individual attention and more help from my professors if I need it. But it's all so stressful and scary that I don't have a choice. I have to grow up right now and decide my future. It's really hard because all up until senior year I knew I would go to college, but I had to make every single life changing decision within the last few months and I don't wanna be making the wrong choice.

Like sometimes I just wish I could wake up and be like ten years older with a good job and all of my decisions already made for me. I want a family when I grow up, and a husband, and a really successful job. But, making all of the decisions to get to that point is so hard!! I wish it was easier but it's definitely not...